A sign before the time?

 

   In the past two months or so, when out strolling around the neighborhood, I’ve noticed yard signs in front of houses indicating that a high school senior lives there.  “Claremont High School SENIOR,” the sign proudly proclaim.  I suspect the signs are someone’s well-intended expansion of yard signs seen poignantly in the last two years, when graduation ceremonies were canceled due to COVID, indicating that a high school graduate, who missed out on commencement as well as prom and other once-in-a-life events, lives herein.

   The signs may be well-intended, but, for me at least, they don’t work.  When I see them, I feel anxiety and pity – probably the exact opposite of the pride and celebration they are intended to signal and provoke. 

   I feel anxious, because I remember how hard I had to work in my senior year of high school.  I think of all the challenging classes, each with a steady heavy load of assignments.  I think of taking tests after test and spending weekends typing papers.  On a very personal level, I think of worrying about getting a passing grade in Algebra II, which I had to do to get into the University of California, which, at time, appeared to be my ticket out of home and Claremont (this was before I came to really appreciate Claremont).

   I feel sorry for the seniors in these houses. If I were in their shoes, this sign, proclaiming my situation to all, wouldn’t be something to cheer but a public constant reminder, more pressure to achieve. It would have felt like something of a scarlet letter, signaling my heavy workload, my burden, weighing me down all the more. I would have felt so much better, so much more like wanting to celebrate and take pride, having a sign up after I knew I had earned that diploma.